LOUSISANA: BALLS?  We learn that a Florida woman bit the
testicles of a camel to free herself after the beast sat on top of her. The
showdown between the unidentified woman and Casper the camel, a roadside
attraction, happened in September 2019 at a truck stop in Louisiana, after she
crawled into its pen to retrieve her dog. Police said the woman had proved the
camel.

FLORIDA: Tomato Brawl? A teenager allegedly
assaulted and threatened her elderly relatives with a knife because she was
denied extra tomatoes at dinner. Katie Gates, 19, went ballistic at the family
dinner in the town of Callahan “because she wanted to eat more than her fair
share of tomatoes,” her grandmother told police. Gates hurled a water bottle at
her grandfather, threw a cigarette pack at her 73-year-old great grandmother,
striking her in the eye, and chased her grandfather with a knife, police said.

FLORIDA: There was no fairy-tale ending to this
story.
Ellen McMillion, 53, whose Facebook page is loaded with photos of
her posing with Mickey, Minnie, Pluto, Snow White and other Disney characters –
allegedly slapped and drunkenly cursed out a taxi driver who refused her a
cigarette at Disney’s Hollywood Studios. After she also kicked the deputy who
arrested her, Ms. McMillion was banned for life from Disney’s Florida theme
parks, officials said

UNITED KINGDOM: You are on Candid Camera Ladies! We learn that a maintenance worker at the film studio where the new James Bond movie “No Time to Die” was in production will do his own time in jail for planting a spy camera in the lady’s bathroom. Peter Hartley, a 50-year-old maintenance worker at Pinewood Studios in suburban London, had been arrested before for planting hidden cameras. PERVERT!

UTAH: The postman always rings twice. It has
been reported that police spent hours in a standoff with a man they believed
had barricaded himself inside his West Jordan home – only to learn the suspect
was not even home. Between 5 a.m. and noon, a SWAT team surrounded the West
Jordan house of 34-year-old Jessie David. They eventually used a flash grenade
to enter – and realized David wasn’t there. We learn that he is still at large.

VIRGINIA: TOXIC TATERS?  In a recent report we learn that a tractor
trailer with an abandoned load of rotten potatoes was deemed so deadly it got
police a police escort to the landfill. Rotting vegetables can emit harmful
gases, and officials were concerned the 40,000 pounds of taters could be toxic
to anyone who came in contact with them.

WASHINGTON: No
loyalty among thieves!
William Kelly called Kennewick police on a Sunday in
late-August 2019 to report that someone had just stolen his 1992 Chevy outside
a tavern. When investigators reviewed surveillance video, they saw a man take
off with Kelly’s car – but they also discovered that Kelly was burglarizing a
business across the street at the time.

The post Weird Criminal Law Stories # 637: Balls… appeared first on Birdsong’s Law Blog.