My kids were 6, 8 and 10 when their dad and I separated. A year later we divorced.

As a single working parent, there was an ever present tension between my time spent with my kids and time spent at work. Their dad eventually got to the point of sharing custody every other week. An arrangement that I detested but also needed.

On even weeks I would stay at the office 12 or so hours a day. Odd weeks, I came in when they left for school which was early, but also left so I’d be back when they returned usually around 3 or 4 in the afternoon. Unless of course there was trial, deposition, or a hearing. Then did more work from home.

The weeks when the kids were mainly with their dad, I hated being at the house and so staying at the office was great. Except I missed them the second I had time to breathe. The weeks when they were with me, I felt the tension of needing to go to work. Or of not giving them my full attention.

It was not a perfect situation. But it was our situation.

This week I turned 60. My kids hijacked my podcast and recorded their thoughts about what kind of a mom I was to them. I hope you’ll give it a listen. It’s episode 51 on the Velvet Hammer podcast.

Photo: My hijacked Instagram page.