When I’m dead,
I really don’t care what you say about me.
I will be dead.
In fact, I really don’t care what you say about me today.
I will someday be dead.
If anyone wants my stuff,
take it.
I won’t need it.
But, make sure you ask Diane first.
She gets the first choice.
When I’m dead,
you can laugh behind my back
about all my foolishness and foibles.
For I will be dead.
In fact, you can come over and laugh at me now,
if it makes you feel better about yourself.
I laugh myself.
I used to be self conscious about my looks
and my weight
and my nose hairs.
I’m not anymore.
For, someday I will be dead.
Please, self help gurus.
Spare me the pious recitations of the need for a legacy.
There is no such thing as legacy for me.
I will be dead.
It may be a present ego boost
to think about all the people who will miss me.
But, hey,
I will be dead.
I don’t care.
I have a modest proposal for you.
After you tell yourself that you are going to die.
And, after you tell yourself that it could be today.
Don’t spend one moment thinking about what happens
after you die.
You will be dead.
