John always sat in the same spot in the same pew, positioned about 50 feet from the side entrance of the church.
Deep in prayer, a rosary wrapped around his left hand, John would lift his head and turn toward me as I entered that side door every Friday morning.
With a slight nod of his head and a warm smile, he made me feel welcome.
That’s all it took. A nod and a smile.
For the past six months, John has been noticeably absent from Friday morning Mass. Last week, we received the difficult news, as the priest announced that John had passed away after a battle with cancer. John’s story was made even more powerful when I learned that he served as caregiver for his very ill wife at the same time he was battling terminal cancer himself.
I never spent any meaningful time with John. Still, in what seems a rather broken world right now, John’s simple act of kindness toward me each time I walked by — a nod and a smile — led me to believe I mattered.
John’s kindness was a gentle reminder to reject the knee-jerk cynicism we often employ when responding to a leave or accommodation request.
So, a few observations:
- In all that we do, be kind. Always. Be. Kind.
- In our professions — HR professionals, leave administrators, employment attorneys – it’s easy to become cynical of employees, right? The migraine headache? Fake. The delay in returning certification? Fake. Let us remember: the overwhelming majority of our employees are good people in need of a workplace lifeline from time to time. For sure, we have no idea what many of our co-workers are dealing with in their own lives. They come to work with plenty of personal baggage, and each one copes differently with it. Next time they ask for time away from work or an accommodation, like John, let’s lead with respect and kindness, not ridicule or silence.
- Finally, let’s not forget: Like parents to our children, we managers of people set the example. When we live by the Golden Rule in the workplace, our subordinates and co-workers see firsthand the respective culture we are trying to build. Use this real-life example as gentle reminder to reconnect with each other.
In a world in desperate need of kindness today, let it begin with me.