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 IMMIGRATION LAW PRACTICE FALL 2019 FIRST DAY CLASS PROBLEM AN IMMIGRATION SCHEME FOR GUADELOUPE Professor Birdsong PART l –THE PROBLEM Assume that it is now the month of December in the year 2022.  Assume further that the country of Guadeloupe which had first become a possession of France in 1635, was until recently a Department of France (State). Guadeloupe declared its independence and seceded from France in a bloodless coup led by Anon Zenon, leader of…
ALASKA: The headline read, “It’s a crime of mammoth proportions.” We learn that an estimated 10,000-year-old mammoth tusk weighing 100 pounds has been stolen from a Campbell Creek Science Center. The federal Bureau of land Management, which runs the center has offered a $500 reward for tips leading to its recovery. FLORIDA: IDIOT! A man was so irritated by a drone hovering above his home he fired seven gunshots at it – and missed every…
FLORIDA: Balls? A man high on drugs had the “balls” to threaten his neighbors with a gun – because his testicles were hurting, police said. The 32-year-old man from the town of Westville allegedly lashed out at fellow residents because he believed they were to blame for “parasites” living in his gonads. CALIFORNIA: The real meaning of the “mile high club,” read the headline. We learn that a Southwest Airlines passenger reportedly lit up a…
UNITED KINGDOM: Shorty alert! British police raced to a notorious sex club when a caller reported seeing a child enter – only to learn the “child” was actually just a very short woman. Police searched ClubF in the village of Stanley, which bills itself as “Britain’s friendliest swinging spot,” and learned it was a false alarm. A manager said the call likely came from a nosey neighbor. UNITED KINGDOM: They called him a flippin’ idiot.…
UNITED KINGDOM: Potato bath, why? A British man was caught filling a bath tub with raw potatoes while wearing a bra over his shirt on a five-day drug binge. After guests at the Travelodge in Eastleigh, England, complained about the smell of marijuana wafting from James Johnson’s room, police searched it and found MDMA and other drugs. When a judge asked why he wanted a potato bath, Johnson, 30, replied, “It felt like the right…
UNITED KINGDOM: Potato bath, why? A British man was caught filling a bath tub with raw potatoes while wearing a bra over his shirt on a five-day drug binge. After guests at the Travelodge in Eastleigh, England, complained about the smell of marijuana wafting from James Johnson’s room, police searched it and found MDMA and other drugs. When a judge asked why he wanted a potato bath, Johnson, 30, replied, “It felt like the right…
FLORIDA: The deputy was a thief too. It has been reported that Broward County Sheriff’s Deputy Henry Guzman allegedly stole $200 worth of merchandise over several days from a Lauderdale Lakes Walmart – while in uniform and working security for the store. He would hide DVD’s and “Star Wars” action figures in his department-issued bullet proof vest, police alleged. Yes, he has been arrested and is under investigation as to whether he will lose his…
OHIO: “This perv has really crappy M.O.,” read the headline. We learn that a serial pooper has struck the same home in an upscale Ohio neighborhood four times in less than a month. The poop dropping idiot was caught on camera defecating on the floor of the home under construction in Clearcreek Township, where houses have sold for $1 million and up. NORTH CAROLINA: We wonder how many miles to the gallon? Two men were…
INDIA: Patience is a virtue, he needed some. A man in India took frustration over airline travel to new height by stabbing himself in the stomach with a ballpoint pen. The 37-year-old was so upset by a three-hour Air India delay in Mumbai that he flew into a rage and jammed the pen into his gut, causing mild bleeding. He was rushed to a hospital and the plane took off without him. INDIANA: Raining cash…