Think about how much of your workday involves communicating with other people. You’re answering emails, participating in meetings, responding to questions, reviewing someone’s work, discussing deadlines and trying to keep projects moving. Even when you’re doing excellent work, a misunderstanding or poorly handled conversation can create unnecessary problems and affect your relationships with colleagues.
I’ve worked with many different personalities throughout my career, and one thing I’ve learned is that people can approach the same conversation with completely different expectations. One person wants a quick answer, while another needs background information before making a decision. Some people prefer a direct conversation, while others want time to review the details. Add competing deadlines, demanding clients and different working styles, and even a relatively straightforward discussion can become more complicated than anyone intended.
Professional communication involves understanding these differences and being thoughtful about how you interact with people. You can be direct, express disagreement, advocate for an idea and address a problem while maintaining respect for the people involved. You can also receive feedback, ask questions and explain your perspective without allowing a difficult conversation to affect the working relationship.
In this second article in my What Professionalism Looks Like at Work series, I want to focus on the communication habits that help people work together more effectively, particularly when the conversation involves feedback, disagreement or a challenging situation.
Link to Understand How Your Communication Style Affects Others Understand How Your Communication Style Affects Others
We all have communication habits that feel natural to us. Some people get straight to the point and prefer brief conversations. Others like to provide background information, talk through different options or ask several questions before reaching a decision. These approaches can all be effective, but problems can develop when we assume everyone communicates the way we do.
For example, you may send a colleague a short email because you’re trying to be efficient, but they may interpret the message as abrupt because they’re accustomed to a more conversational approach. You might ask several questions during a meeting because you’re trying to understand a proposal, while someone else may interpret those questions as disagreement. Recognizing that people can experience the same interaction differently gives you an opportunity to communicate more effectively.
I encourage professionals to pay attention to the communication preferences of the people they work with most frequently. Does your manager prefer a concise summary with a recommendation, or do they want to review the details? Does a colleague respond more effectively to a quick conversation than a lengthy email? Understanding these preferences can help you avoid misunderstandings and make your interactions more productive.
You can also ask trusted colleagues how they experience your communication style. Their observations may help you recognize habits you haven’t noticed, such as providing too much background before getting to the main point or moving through a discussion before everyone has had an opportunity to contribute.
The ability to adapt your approach to different situations is an important professional skill, and it becomes more valuable as you work with a wider range of colleagues, clients and leaders.
Link to Be Direct and Give People the Information They Need Be Direct and Give People the Information They Need
I appreciate direct communication because it helps people understand what needs to happen and allows them to focus on the work. But being direct also means giving someone enough information to act on what you’re saying.
Imagine receiving an email that says, “This presentation needs work. Please revise it.” You know something needs to change, but you have no idea which sections are problematic, what the reviewer expected or how extensive the revisions need to be. You may spend time making changes that don’t address the actual concern, leading to another round of revisions and frustration for everyone involved.
Now imagine receiving a message that says, “The client wants us to emphasize our experience in the healthcare sector. Please move those examples to the beginning, shorten the firm overview and send me the revised presentation by 3 p.m.” That message provides a clear direction, explains the reason for the changes and establishes a deadline.
The same principle applies when you’re the person raising an issue. If you’re concerned that a project can’t be completed within the proposed timeline, explain which tasks require additional time and offer a realistic alternative. If you need clarification about an assignment, identify the specific information you’re missing so the other person can respond efficiently.
Being clear about expectations, responsibilities and next steps saves time and reduces the likelihood of misunderstandings. It also makes it easier for colleagues to deliver the work you actually need.
Link to Know When to Send an Email and When to Have a Conversation Know When to Send an Email and When to Have a Conversation
We’ve all experienced email exchanges that become increasingly complicated because the people involved are interpreting the messages differently or responding to only part of what’s being discussed. Sometimes a five-minute conversation could resolve an issue that has generated a dozen emails.
Email is useful for sharing information, confirming decisions and documenting important details. It’s also helpful when someone needs time to review a document or think through a proposal. But when a discussion involves sensitive feedback, competing priorities or a disagreement that isn’t being resolved, a conversation may be more productive.
Before sending an email about a difficult subject, think about whether the recipient will have enough context to understand your message. Consider whether the tone could be misinterpreted and whether the issue would benefit from an opportunity to ask questions. If you’re frustrated, drafting the message and reviewing it before sending can help you identify wording that may distract from the point you’re trying to make.
Timing deserves attention as well. Raising a complicated issue when someone is preparing for an important client meeting may not produce a productive discussion. Asking when they have time to talk can give both of you an opportunity to focus on the subject.
I also encourage people to recognize when an email exchange has reached the point where continuing to write back and forth isn’t helping. A brief message suggesting a call can prevent a misunderstanding from becoming a much larger issue.
Link to Listen Before Deciding How to Respond Listen Before Deciding How to Respond
One of the easiest communication habits to overlook is listening. When we’re concerned about a deadline, convinced that our approach is correct or trying to explain a complicated situation, it’s tempting to focus on what we want to say next.
I’ve seen conversations become unnecessarily difficult because the participants were responding to their assumptions about what the other person meant. Asking a few additional questions could have revealed that they were working with different information or had misunderstood the purpose of the discussion.
For example, a colleague who seems reluctant to take on another assignment may already be managing several urgent projects. A manager who changes the direction of a presentation may have received new information from the client. Understanding those circumstances can help you identify a practical solution.
When something isn’t clear, ask the person to explain their reasoning or provide additional context. You can also summarize what you’ve heard to confirm that you’re working from the same understanding. This is particularly useful when a conversation involves several priorities or a complicated assignment.
Listening also creates an opportunity to recognize when another person has information or experience that you hadn’t considered. Being willing to adjust your perspective based on that information contributes to better decisions and stronger working relationships.
Link to Learn How to Disagree Without Damaging the Relationship Learn How to Disagree Without Damaging the Relationship
Disagreement is a normal part of working with other people, especially in professional environments where decisions involve competing priorities, client expectations and significant business considerations. A team benefits from having people who can identify potential problems, question assumptions and offer alternative approaches.
The way you express disagreement can influence whether your perspective is heard and how effectively the conversation moves forward. I encourage people to focus on the specific issue, explain their reasoning and identify what they believe would improve the outcome.
If you disagree with a proposed approach to a project, explain the concern and offer an alternative. You might point out that a particular timeline doesn’t account for an important review process or that the proposed presentation doesn’t address one of the client’s stated priorities. Providing specific information gives the other person something meaningful to evaluate.
It’s also important to listen to the reasoning behind the original decision. There may be budget considerations, client preferences or other circumstances that weren’t initially apparent. Understanding those factors can help you refine your recommendation or recognize why a different approach was selected.
Not every disagreement will end with everyone reaching the same conclusion. Once a decision has been made, clarify what needs to happen next and how you can contribute to the work. When a significant concern remains, address it through the appropriate channels with a clear explanation of the issue.
Professional disagreement works best when everyone remains focused on the substance of the discussion and treats the other participants with respect.
Link to Make Feedback a Conversation That Leads to Improvement Make Feedback a Conversation That Leads to Improvement
Giving and receiving feedback can be uncomfortable, particularly when the subject involves communication, collaboration or something that didn’t go as planned. But feedback is much more useful when both people approach it as an opportunity to understand what happened and determine what would be more effective in the future.
If you’re providing feedback, identify the specific behavior or work product you’re addressing. Explain why it matters and describe what you’d like to see done differently. For example, if a colleague repeatedly submits materials without allowing enough time for review, explain how that affects the team’s ability to meet deadlines and agree on a schedule that gives everyone adequate time to complete their responsibilities.
If you’re receiving feedback, listen to the concern and ask questions when the expectation isn’t clear. You might ask for an example, clarify which part of your approach needs to change or discuss what a successful outcome would look like. Understanding the expectation makes it easier to determine how to respond.
It’s also helpful for both people to discuss any circumstances that may have contributed to the situation. An employee may have been working with conflicting instructions, while a manager may have been responding to a change in client expectations. Having that information can lead to a more complete understanding and a better plan for moving forward.
I encourage managers and employees to make feedback part of their regular conversations instead of reserving it for performance reviews or situations where something has gone wrong. Frequent, specific feedback helps people understand expectations, make adjustments and recognize the progress they’re making.
Link to Prepare for Difficult Conversations Instead of Avoiding Them Prepare for Difficult Conversations Instead of Avoiding Them
There will be times when you need to discuss an issue that makes you uncomfortable. You may need to address a missed deadline, explain that you disagree with a decision, discuss a problem with a colleague or ask for clarification about your responsibilities.
Avoiding the conversation can allow the issue to continue, but approaching it without preparation may make it harder to communicate effectively. Before the discussion, identify the specific concern, gather the relevant information and think about what you’d like to accomplish. Consider what the other person may need to understand and what questions they might have.
For example, if you’re concerned about competing deadlines, prepare a list of your current assignments, the time required for each and the decisions you need about priorities. This gives your manager the information needed to help determine how the work can be handled.
During the conversation, focus on explaining the situation and understanding the other person’s perspective. If new information emerges, take time to evaluate it before responding. When a discussion becomes complicated, summarizing the main points can help everyone identify what has been resolved and what still needs attention.
Preparation can make difficult conversations more manageable because it allows you to focus on the issue, communicate your perspective and work toward an outcome that supports the work.
Link to Follow Up So Everyone Understands What Happens Next Follow Up So Everyone Understands What Happens Next
An important conversation can still lead to problems when people leave with different understandings of what was decided. This is particularly common when a discussion involves several assignments, changes to a project or responsibilities shared among multiple people.
I encourage professionals to develop the habit of confirming important decisions and next steps. A brief follow-up email can summarize the agreed-upon approach, identify who is responsible for each action and establish relevant deadlines. It also gives everyone an opportunity to clarify something that may have been misunderstood.
For example, after discussing changes to a client presentation, you might confirm which sections will be revised, who will provide additional information and when the next draft will be ready for review. This helps the team stay organized and reduces the likelihood that someone will proceed based on an incorrect assumption.
Following through on these commitments is equally important. When you complete an assignment, provide an update or let the relevant people know if circumstances have changed. Consistent communication helps colleagues plan their own work and builds confidence in your reliability.
Link to Small Changes That Can Improve Your Communication Small Changes That Can Improve Your Communication
Improving your communication doesn’t require changing everything about the way you interact with people. Start by identifying the situations where you experience the most difficulty. Perhaps your emails generate repeated questions, meetings end without clear decisions or conversations about competing priorities take longer than necessary.
Choose one or two habits to work on. You might begin providing a clearer recommendation at the beginning of an email, asking an additional question before responding to a concern or confirming next steps after important meetings. Pay attention to whether these adjustments make your interactions more productive and ask for feedback from colleagues whose judgment you trust.
Managers can also examine how they communicate expectations, provide direction and respond when employees need clarification. Making time for regular conversations about priorities and performance can help teams address issues earlier and maintain a shared understanding of what needs to be accomplished.
The most useful changes are often the ones you can incorporate into your existing routine. Consistent attention to communication can improve collaboration, reduce unnecessary work and make challenging situations easier to navigate.
Link to Creating Stronger Working Relationships Through Better Communication Creating Stronger Working Relationships Through Better Communication
Professional communication influences how effectively we collaborate, how we serve clients and how we develop relationships throughout our careers. The ability to explain expectations clearly, listen to different perspectives, handle disagreements constructively and follow through on commitments helps people work together with greater confidence.
I encourage both employees and leaders to pay attention to how their communication affects the people around them. Think about whether your messages provide enough information, whether you’re making time to understand another person’s perspective and whether important conversations end with clear next steps. These are practical areas where small adjustments can make a meaningful difference.
As you think about your own communication habits, identify one area you’d like to strengthen and make a deliberate effort to practice it over the next few weeks. Improving how you communicate can help you become a more effective colleague, adviser and leader while building stronger relationships with the people you work with every day.
About the What Professionalism Looks Like at Work Series: In this series, Stefanie Marrone explores the everyday behaviors, communication skills and leadership practices that shape our experiences at work. Each article offers practical insights for professionals and leaders who want to build stronger relationships, communicate more effectively and create workplaces where people can do their best work. Have an idea for a future article or a topic you’d like me to cover? Email me.